Remembering how I started

Around a year ago I got the idea of just buying stuff for her and maybe getting picture sets or short videos. Because I thought she will never talk to me or even notice me. Then it started to grow, we talked more and I got to know her, I'm not delusional but I'm dumb enough and a dreamer to think it could be more. 

My heart just went wild, still just trying to help her but at the same time falling for her, hard. But still I thought it was impossible to get into a relationship with her, my dead-end job, the almost no chance of moving to Spain, my economy always on red. But then, I got the idea of following my brother's steps, move to the US with the teacher program, is difficult, is hard and costly. But is a way, then I started looking for a way to get a farm so she could have a horse and everything. But still I'm just a random guy on her screen who sends her messages, and that breaks me every day, I want to be more, I want to hug her and talk to her everyday, help her taking care of her pets, to look at her in the mornings and cook and bake for her.

But that is drawing on delusional, I'll keep my journey, try to help her as much as I can and improve myself. I'll give my best but will not expect for her to fall for me or even be nice about it (even though she is super nice and sweet) I'll be here for her and I need to be happy with it. Just for her to know that I like her and she has my heart.